DM MEETS ORLANDO BLOOM & KEIRA KNIGHTLEY
Pirates of the Caribbean 2: Dead Man's Chest (12A)
reviewed by David Mahmoudieh at the
UK premier, Leicester Sq, London
Buckle up bandits, if it’s pirates ye want, it’s pirates ye’ll get – and by the vessel! That be the tune ye scurvy scallywags sing once cast under the spell of the infectious Pirates of the Caribbean 2: Dead Man’s Chest. Ooh-aar!! And given the finger-on-chalkboard grating cinematic ‘events’ we’ve suffered over a dire, disappointing summer of bigticket cinema, I’d say we shipmates were long overdue an enthralling voyage into the pleasant unknown.
Following the hugely popular Curse of the Black Pearl, legendary scribes Ted Elliot and Terry Rossio (the same writing collaborative behind the first installment, as well as the equally audacious Shrek) halt the downward spiral of bank-busting, behemoth movies with this raucous, seafaring adventure for the masses. And considering the film’s title’s dubious synergy with a Disneyland theme park ride – it’s no surprise they seem to know the difference between getting you to buy a ticket and giving you your money’s worth.
The duo provide a criminally quirky script tailor-made with the objective of inducing another go-for-broke performance from Johnny Depp, donning the dreads, the mascara and gold teeth as dandified buccaneer Jack Sparrow, a pirate once so unpirately, he made a deal with the black spirit of the seas – a deal he may not live long enough to regret.
(A Wanted Man: Sparrow treads water
to evade the clutches of his captors)
You’ll be pleased to know that in the three years since Curse of the Black Pearl, Jack has lost none of his narcissist traditions.
Having returned to his duties as a globetrotter, he is still managing to stage his speech in tandem with his constant staggering from side to side like a true drunken sailor. But this pirate’s dream threatens to fast become overrun with the nightmare origins from which it was spawned.
Turns out ol’ Captain Jack traded his soul 13 years ago in order to become a full bona-fide pirate and now his time is up. Chasing him down is his quintessence’s new rightful owner, the coldblooded Davy Jones (Bill Nighy), a halfsquid, half-crab hybrid with just about enough evil to shiver anybody’s timbers, who wants Sparrow’s soul almost as much he wants him doomed to eternal damnation and servitude in the afterlife.
(Yes, that really is Bill Nighy under there)
Jack’s only hope lies within a compass that leads to a chest within which lies Davy’s beating heart.
Of course, these things are never simple – and aren’t any fun when they are – so it’s no surprise when Jack’s quest just so happens to interfere with the wedding plans of a certain Will Turner (Orlando Bloom) and Elizabeth Swann (Keira Knightley) who are indirectly forced to join him on yet another one of his misadventures.
Naturally, such a treasure of a squidman’s heart bedazzles the desires of more than just an unorthodox pirate – in particular the aristocratic Lord Cutler Beckett (Tom Hollander) who on the eve of their big day arrests Elizabeth and tells Will he might spare Elizabeth’s life if the young man leads him to the pragmatic Capt. Jack.
As if that wasn’t enough to contend with, Jack has a whole army of Davy Jones’ various crustacean-encrusted crew baying for his blood, including another fish-faced fiend in the mould of Jones’ hammerhead shark-featured lieutenant.
This is the stuff that myths are made of! Admittedly, some of the characters and sub-plots hold about as much water as a fishnet but this is fun and fable, not the logic and labour of quantifiable storytelling.
Pirates is what blockbusters are supposed to be; devoid of rationale or reality in favour of magnified myth and mayhem; of complete adrenaline-charged escapism. And few worlds are more outlandish or flash than this one.
(Never one to disappoint his fans, JD signed for
over an hour at the film's opening in London)
Confirmation of such public approval was evident at the film’s Leicester Square premiere where quite literally thousands queued for hours to be rewarded with an hour-and-a-half walkabout by the film’s three stars.
Catching a moment with Knightly and Bloom, who seemed joined at the hip throughout their parade, I thought I’d take the opportunity in putting them on the spot by asking what they liked best about working with each other a second time-round.
A surprised playful glance at each other ensued, with Knightley quickest to respond, “Erm, I don’t really know, I must be crazier than Jack Sparrow!”, she joked, swiftly followed by a more authentic response. “No, I’m just kidding. I think having worked together on the first one, it was a great re-union and everyone was looking forward to it. Even me.”
Oh, how modest of you, Keira.
(The Photographers Photographed: Keira strikes a pose)
Bloom chipped in with an analysis of his own, “Yeah, it was just so much fun last time and we knew Dead Man’s Chest could be greater than its predecessor, which should really be the whole reason for doing a sequel rather than just for the sake of it.”
(The Hand of Power: big-ticket producer Jerry
Bruckheimer signing away in Leicester Sq.)
Indeed, there’s no denying that this is a much-more ambitious project than Curse of the Black Pearl but, at 2hrs and 30 minutes, is a bit of an expedition. A real-life pirate could probably braid his beard in the time it takes for producer Jerry Bruckheimer’s floating franchise to cut loose from the harbours of narrative affirmation and put some wind in its sails. But once it does get going, there’s no stopping it.
This could be one sequel destined to seize the box office treasures.
© David Mahmoudieh 2006
Pirates of the Caribbean 2: Dead Man's Chest (12A)
reviewed by David Mahmoudieh at the
UK premier, Leicester Sq, London
Buckle up bandits, if it’s pirates ye want, it’s pirates ye’ll get – and by the vessel! That be the tune ye scurvy scallywags sing once cast under the spell of the infectious Pirates of the Caribbean 2: Dead Man’s Chest. Ooh-aar!! And given the finger-on-chalkboard grating cinematic ‘events’ we’ve suffered over a dire, disappointing summer of bigticket cinema, I’d say we shipmates were long overdue an enthralling voyage into the pleasant unknown.
Following the hugely popular Curse of the Black Pearl, legendary scribes Ted Elliot and Terry Rossio (the same writing collaborative behind the first installment, as well as the equally audacious Shrek) halt the downward spiral of bank-busting, behemoth movies with this raucous, seafaring adventure for the masses. And considering the film’s title’s dubious synergy with a Disneyland theme park ride – it’s no surprise they seem to know the difference between getting you to buy a ticket and giving you your money’s worth.
The duo provide a criminally quirky script tailor-made with the objective of inducing another go-for-broke performance from Johnny Depp, donning the dreads, the mascara and gold teeth as dandified buccaneer Jack Sparrow, a pirate once so unpirately, he made a deal with the black spirit of the seas – a deal he may not live long enough to regret.
(A Wanted Man: Sparrow treads water
to evade the clutches of his captors)
You’ll be pleased to know that in the three years since Curse of the Black Pearl, Jack has lost none of his narcissist traditions.
Having returned to his duties as a globetrotter, he is still managing to stage his speech in tandem with his constant staggering from side to side like a true drunken sailor. But this pirate’s dream threatens to fast become overrun with the nightmare origins from which it was spawned.
Turns out ol’ Captain Jack traded his soul 13 years ago in order to become a full bona-fide pirate and now his time is up. Chasing him down is his quintessence’s new rightful owner, the coldblooded Davy Jones (Bill Nighy), a halfsquid, half-crab hybrid with just about enough evil to shiver anybody’s timbers, who wants Sparrow’s soul almost as much he wants him doomed to eternal damnation and servitude in the afterlife.
(Yes, that really is Bill Nighy under there)
Jack’s only hope lies within a compass that leads to a chest within which lies Davy’s beating heart.
Of course, these things are never simple – and aren’t any fun when they are – so it’s no surprise when Jack’s quest just so happens to interfere with the wedding plans of a certain Will Turner (Orlando Bloom) and Elizabeth Swann (Keira Knightley) who are indirectly forced to join him on yet another one of his misadventures.
Naturally, such a treasure of a squidman’s heart bedazzles the desires of more than just an unorthodox pirate – in particular the aristocratic Lord Cutler Beckett (Tom Hollander) who on the eve of their big day arrests Elizabeth and tells Will he might spare Elizabeth’s life if the young man leads him to the pragmatic Capt. Jack.
As if that wasn’t enough to contend with, Jack has a whole army of Davy Jones’ various crustacean-encrusted crew baying for his blood, including another fish-faced fiend in the mould of Jones’ hammerhead shark-featured lieutenant.
This is the stuff that myths are made of! Admittedly, some of the characters and sub-plots hold about as much water as a fishnet but this is fun and fable, not the logic and labour of quantifiable storytelling.
Pirates is what blockbusters are supposed to be; devoid of rationale or reality in favour of magnified myth and mayhem; of complete adrenaline-charged escapism. And few worlds are more outlandish or flash than this one.
(Never one to disappoint his fans, JD signed for
over an hour at the film's opening in London)
Confirmation of such public approval was evident at the film’s Leicester Square premiere where quite literally thousands queued for hours to be rewarded with an hour-and-a-half walkabout by the film’s three stars.
Catching a moment with Knightly and Bloom, who seemed joined at the hip throughout their parade, I thought I’d take the opportunity in putting them on the spot by asking what they liked best about working with each other a second time-round.
A surprised playful glance at each other ensued, with Knightley quickest to respond, “Erm, I don’t really know, I must be crazier than Jack Sparrow!”, she joked, swiftly followed by a more authentic response. “No, I’m just kidding. I think having worked together on the first one, it was a great re-union and everyone was looking forward to it. Even me.”
Oh, how modest of you, Keira.
(The Photographers Photographed: Keira strikes a pose)
Bloom chipped in with an analysis of his own, “Yeah, it was just so much fun last time and we knew Dead Man’s Chest could be greater than its predecessor, which should really be the whole reason for doing a sequel rather than just for the sake of it.”
(The Hand of Power: big-ticket producer Jerry
Bruckheimer signing away in Leicester Sq.)
Indeed, there’s no denying that this is a much-more ambitious project than Curse of the Black Pearl but, at 2hrs and 30 minutes, is a bit of an expedition. A real-life pirate could probably braid his beard in the time it takes for producer Jerry Bruckheimer’s floating franchise to cut loose from the harbours of narrative affirmation and put some wind in its sails. But once it does get going, there’s no stopping it.
This could be one sequel destined to seize the box office treasures.
© David Mahmoudieh 2006
posted by David Mahmoudieh at 8:32 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home